Good Morning Everyone! Wow! Well since I'm off of FB, I am going to be posting here to my blog spot more then there, hey why give them all the all my glory, right!
Well pep's if you read my last post you know that I have been very depressed and it has been debilitating to me. But I have over the past few weeks of rest and alone time and I do mean alone time! I stopped doing everything, I fucking ran away from it all. Well I am slowing feeling my motivation coming back. Funny how people say don't let things get you down, but yet it's just so much at times that a person can deal with and boy oh boy at my age (about to be (46 and freaking menopausal) not to mention documented Crazy as fuck! I have been going through it with myself, and part of it has been this....
Look at this picture of me I took this morning. Ichrenge when I look at myself, not my back side my ass, but this freakin belly is like eeeww to me! Lol! That's right I am not scared to speak the truth about myself. And I know some of you will say that I am being way to hard on myself. But Dammit I hate my stomach right now and I'm scared to be out here filming calling myself sexy when my shit is like this.
I know that there are so many other ladies out there and thank Goodness for some of you men that just really don't give a fuck, and or are like well sweety what do they expected at your age and three babies, bad back etc. But I want to look my best for my fans and I dont feel I do. I love that Black men have made the Big Ass such a great thing and I want to keep that, but to me being round in the front and in the back, I mean I have had to people ask me when Im giving birth? Huh? WTF! That means I am Fat and Not PHAT! LOMFAO! Dammit Man! I gotta step it up! So i can start to feel sexy again and get back at being happy crazy but sexy MILF that I so once was, but much more improved.
OMG! my fans I miss you also much, I am trying not to beat myself up so, but I gotta motivate and stop this laziness and woo is me shit Right! Hey you don't have to tell me I know this shit about myself, but dammit its hard. But Imma get on it and in the mean time for all of my true I mean true fans like those that give me positive feed back, those that send me support financially and mentally and just are very sincerely kind, but love my sexy side too. I say this cause I do feel alot of hate from those that just think Imma crazy mean bitch, that is crying out way to much. Lol! I know I should just ignore ya'll but at times I do feel the hate and it gets me down. But to those of you that really like your SeXyAssSaXXX I am so so very Thankful for you! You are the Freakin Best! You are the only reason I try so hard, even when others have dumped on me. My Fans you are really my motivation to keep on plugging on. Fuck it I will get it together one day.... Lol! So my peps join me here for all my Sexy madness one thing I can promise you is My daily blogs here will be very interesting, entertaining and truthful with all the craziness that is me (SaXXX bka saxxxjust4u aka SeXyAssSaXXX aka SaxTripleX aka Sj ForU and so anything SJ4U google me and see all the shit I have all over the place! Im telling you.
PS. I know I know I need too post more of My Sexy Stuff and I will, I know I need to cause cash is always needed. So Imma buckle down and get to it, working back out and posting, dammit I just want to be happy again with myself and all that I do. I have no real reason not to now that I have cleaned out my closets Hint, read my last post. LOL! Wish me luck, and Thanks for staying in touch if you are one of my True Fans..... Muaw!
Dam I am So Fat! Help keep me motivated! Your Positive Feed Back and /or Comment Are Always Appreciated! Oh and those of you that always send me Donations........... My GYM Fee always needs paying :)